Tuesday, April 10, 2007


I am beginning to emit lots of noises whenever I do anything like bend over, get up off the couch or bed, or sit down. Oooooof is my most common noise. Sometimes, inexplicably, I say, "All right," as in "All right, how the fuck do I get off of this couch?" It all amounts to rather old-ladyish behavior. My dog has been looking at me askance, even though he might deny it.

I have been lucky not to be too uncomfortable in this pregnancy, aside from the yarping and nausea and heartburn. I haven't felt bulky; I haven't had back pain; I haven't waddled or huffed and puffed or even lost too many steps at the gym. I haven't had swelling; I haven't fallen down (yet); and I can still wear high heels when I want. But now I'm really beginning to feel pregnant - the skin on my tummy feels streeeeeeeetched and resistant, and I am peeing 6-10 times a night. My dreams, which are always vivid and weird, are now so insane that I can spend 9 hours in bed and still come out of it feeling exhausted. And speaking of exhaustion, naps are beginning to sound appealing - I do just generally feel more tired now.

Re: dreams - I am now starting to have childbirth- or child-rearing-related dreams. Last night, I dreamed I was breastfeeding (improbably quite easily, I might add), but then my charming baby with a full head of hair was replaced by Ju.de Law, who was sitting in my lap and refusing to get out so I could return to my feelings of self-love over my natural breastfeeding skills.

I am also starting to feel more on edge emotionally. For most of this pregnancy, I've found that I'm not at all hormonal in the classic pregnancy sense - if anything, I've been less prone to tears and more prone to being mean (e.g., being very ready to deliver lectures to people cutting in line or otherwise violating the social contract) than usual. But now that the end date is approaching, the stress level has ratcheted up, the restful sleep has ratcheted down, and I feel as if I might burst into tears if a checkout clerk asks me if I'd like my receipt. Okay, it isn't that bad yet, but I could see it getting there. I'm always like this in stressful situations, like when a big project is coming due and I have 10,000 things to do in too little time. Let's hope this baby stays in for a few more weeks so I can get some shit done.

Random aside: my insurance covers renting or purchasing a breast pump. Does yours? I would never have known if Bihari hadn't told me this, so I thought I'd spread the word in case yours does as well. That said, my insurance does totally rock (hence my willingness to stay in a relatively low-paying job), so it may be an anomaly.

The baby is still breech. His head is in my ribs all day, and his feet are kicking me down below. We have an ultrasound next week, at which time I hope to get a good look at his fat little cheeks and full head of hair. And clubfoot.


My Reality said...

Maybe you will see Ju.de Law on the ultrasound screen.

You dream is kind of weird. And I am not sure if it is weird in a good way!

TLB said...

Funny, in my dreams I was breastfeeding Ju.de Law too. Coincidence?

Emmie said...

I hear you on the sudden emotional outbursts. I cried three times this week for no good reason. Luckily I've been removed from society so that only my cats and sometimes H are around to witness it. The other night H scared the cat away from where he was sleeping and it made me cry. Weird.