Monday, September 17, 2007

The final tally

Our little boy got four months of breastfeeding. His last breast milk was ingested on Friday - I'd pumped it a couple of days earlier since I was heading out to the family reunion at the ungodly hour of 4:30am. Anyway, four months feels pretty good, even though it was about 80% formula for the last month. The pump and I parted ways more or less amicably. I'm currently enduring a bit of engorgement and possibly a plugged duct, but I'm hoping that'll subside soon. I'd say I don't know what to do with all the time that not-pumping frees up, but it turns out there's a long list of tasks-in-waiting that are prepared to jump in.

Some tasks, however, we just can't get done. Like, the handle on our upstairs toilet is broken. This means that in order to flush, we have to reach into the tank and pull the thingamajig with our bare hands. It looks easy to fix - like you'd just take the handle, arm, and chain into a home store and get the new part. But that's the kind of stuff we just don't have time to do. So I called the handyman. He was out of town. I called again. No call back. I should call again, but at this point it's been two weeks, and now it just seems perfectly normal to flush the toilet by reaching into the tank. It's funny how you can get used to disarray. Our living room seems clean by comparison to how it was at the beginning of's life, but an impartial, dispassionate eye would undoubtedly report it to the health inspector.

My weekend away from the boys (husband, son, dog) was good. I missed the little fellow, but it sure was nice to have two days of not being on the baby clock at all. In hindsight, however, it would have been an easy trip to take him on - short flights on regional jets (which are mellower to board) with lots of family waiting at our destination. Instead, his first plane trip will be next month, when we fly many hours to go to my husband's college reunion. Anyway, the family reunion was really fun, and I found an old photo of my father that bears a very close resemblance to My husband won't admit of the resemblance, however - my father has a cleft chin, and I'm pretty sure does as well, but my husband dislikes cleft chins. had his four-month checkup today. He got more shots, which he found to be unsuited to his preferences. He was 16 lbs and 26.5 inches, which are 75th and 95th percentile, respectively. Tall and thin! Maybe he'll be a runway model! His head was 80th percentile. The pediatrician said we should consider starting solids relatively soon since occasionally puts back a lot of formula, but I think I am going to hold off for now because he's gone back to eating more modest amounts of food (as would be appropriate for a runway model).

I keep feeling posts a-brewin' about infertility but haven't pulled them together yet. I must do so. My husband, however, is out of town all week for work, so I'm a harried single mother for the moment. I am very anxious about tonight, my first night ever alone with the baby. I hope he'll be a first-rate sleeper and all smiles and sunshine during his awake times and that he'll issue forth tidy BMs smelling of tuberose and gardenia.


Anonymous said...

Congrats on making it to 4 months! I hope your night alone with goes off without a hitch.

Meg said...

Congratulations on making it to four months, S! Such an amazing achievement after all the trouble you have been through. It must be sooooo wonderful to be free of the damn electric baby... I do envy you that (though I hve gotten encreasingly slack now J is pumps a day... I need my sanity more than he needs to avoid a couple of bottles of formula, quite frankly...)

Weekend away... what I wouldn't give...


Meg said...

Here is whereI realise my comment doesnt make sense.

I meant J is latching on. Thus my slackness of 2 or 3 pumps a day.

Alexandra said...


I just wanted to thank you for your post on Thalia's blog. I'm another mom (and IFer) who had a ton of trouble with b/f'ing. While I stuck with it and do now find it "easy," I am probably not his major source of food. Anyway I do still have those "if only" moments -- if only I'd tried harder (or try harder now), if only I'd been willing to try the drugs (I wasn't)...well, the point is, THANK you for saying that not all of us can do it and that it's not just about how hard you try. Because on the one hand I do know that but on the other, I struggle with wishing this, at least, had been easy and that I had been able to reach my goal of b/f'ing exclusively. Goal revised, but not completely without regrets, however, there it is.